Episode 110: Feelin’ the Boundary-Backlash? How to stop fearing the boundary reactions of others and create the environment you need in order to thrive.

Dec 13, 2021


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This time of the year is all about going inward and allowing yourself some pre-holiday social rest. Chilly hints from Northern Hemisphere skies in the form of snow days and icicles are a literal permission slip to stay home, get cozy, and reflect.

So, what have we been reflecting on? 

A whole year of boundary practice: Are we setting enough of them? Are we letting fear get in the way? How can we set more of them? What if my boundaries make people mad?  

Know this: A boundary is a contract between you and yourself; between yourself and what you value. If the boundary you’ve created isn’t respected, even if someone gets upset, their reaction is their decision...and their reaction is usually not your responsibility to manage

Over time, we know that relationships change.  The ones that don’t hold water anymore will shift currents. And that’s how the river keeps moving forward, past all of the fallen trees and boulders that might try to impede its progress.

In this episode, Karlee and this month’s co-host Anitza Martins are offering up another bite-sized portion of audio dark chocolate for your listening pleasure. And this week, it’s Boundary-flavored...our favorite! 

Today, you’ll hear why boundary-setting can sometimes create conflict, and how you can handle that disharmony in a healthy, meaningful way. They’ll talk about processing the real information that’s wrapped up in other people’s emotional responses, and why it’s perfectly ok to give yourself permission to walk away. 

Thriving is all about setting the boundaries you need, maintaining them, and making sure that the current you’re rolling with is made up of people who are supporting you in being and finding your best self. 

If you’re ready to stop fearing the boundary reactions of others and create the environment you need in order to thrive, then this episode is for you. 

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

  • How to overcome your boundary-based fears (2:42)
  • The messaging wrapped within other people’s responses to our boundaries (4:01)
  • Separating the reasonable from the unreasonable (7:40)
  • The joy of not doing things you don’t wanna do anymore (10:05)

People Mentioned in this Episode:

Dr. Valerie Rein

Send your Audio Comments and Questions to [email protected]

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Messy and Magnificent is produced by the folx at Ginni Media.

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